Date/Time: August 9, 2014, 1:30pm wave
Size: Thousands of competitors
Weather: Mid-80s, sunny
Course: Moderate hills, heavy woods, extremely muddy (of course!)
Charity: St. Jude Children's Research Hospital
Distance: 3.2 mi mud run
Time: Not timed, but roughly 1.5 hrs.
2.5 showers later, and I'm still not sure if I got all the dirt off.
My friend and I became interested in mud runs early in the summer, and we originally planned to meet in the Cleveland area for the Dirty Girl Run. Tons of drama and confusion ensued (read the news if you're curious, I don't really want to relive it), and we ended up registered for the Warrior Dash instead, which took place in a park in rural northeast Ohio.
Here's the short version: climb, crawl, mud, water. Repeat. Fall flat on my back. Finish. Shower for days.
But for more detail, please proceed. It's a long one!
Warrior Dash's website has a list of all their obstacles, so I will structure this recap based on those.
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| There were TONS of people there. |
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| We're in the pink. |
We ran/walked through over half a mile of wooded trail before reaching our first obstacle. That first stretch of trail wasn't any more difficult than other trails I've run on before, though I did have to keep an eye out for exposed tree roots.
After emerging out of the woods by climbing up a a very muddy ledge, we hit our first obstacle in an open clearing of the park, which was Storming Normandy. We just crawled under some barbed wire while being sprayed with water. My friend and I are both short, small people, so it was easy for us. With our confidence deceptively inflated, we ran along.
Our second obstacle was maybe a quarter mile, and it was Shocktop Unfiltered. It consisted of a vertical plywood wall with rungs on either side, about 8ft tall, followed by a crawl under a sheet, and another vertical plywood wall that was a little bit taller. I tackled the first wall, with very little difficulty, but when my friend tried to follow me, she ended realizing her fear of heights and had a panic attack on top of the wall. I talked to her carefully, and eventually got her down, but after crawling under the sheet, she decided to skip the second wall. I don't blame her!
Iron Crossing was next, and since it didn't involve heights, just moving sideways across a rope net, we thought it would be pretty easy. My friend didn't have much of a problem with it, but my arms were not having it! I think I leaned too far back instead of relying on leg strength, so my skinny little piano arms took the brunt of my weight. Anyway, I gave up 3/4 way through cause I couldn't hold on any longer.
We had a water stop, which I ended up using to rinse out my mouth (it turns out I hate the feeling of dirt on my teeth). We ran through maybe 1/3 of a mile of wooded trail, though this was a anxious run because we caught a glimpse of the next obstacle....
....Deadman's Drop. Even the name is terrifying, and remember how my friend is afraid of heights? Basically, we had to climb up a wall with rungs on a VERY steep incline. There were no rungs on the other side to help us get down though. It was a about a 7ft drop into a mud pile. I didn't realize this until I got to the top, and by that time, it was too late to turn back. So I closed my eyes and let go. That half second was horribly terrifying and wonderfully exhilarating at the same time. And my friend? She handled it surprisingly well. She tackled it quickly so she didn't have time to dwell on her fear. After she was done, she gave me a huge hug, then we were on our way.
Our legs (and my hands) were covered in mud from the landing, so we were quite pleased when our subsequent run through the woods took us right through a creek. We tried to rinse off in the water, which was nice for about .5 seconds. Cause after the creek, we had to run through some serious mud. And by serious, I mean soft, trampled mud about a foot thick. At some points, it threatened to suck my shoe right off my foot, and at others, it had me sliding like a figure skater on ice (my 4yr old shoes had literally no treads left). My friend had to grab my arm to keep me relatively vertical.
Next was an unlisted obstacle in a grassy clearing (no more sliding in mud!). It was a lot like Iron Crossing, but horizontal, so we had to crawl across a rope net suspended about 4ft off the ground. This was my least favorite obstacle because 1. The supervising volunteer was asleep, 2. I suddenly developed this irrational fear of having my leg fall through the net, losing circulation, and getting said leg amputated, and 3. A group of huge men decided I was going too slow and literally climbed over me. I'm glad to say, though, that with a little encouragement from my friend, I inched across without losing a limb or getting trampled.
After another short run through the woods, we reached Trenches, which was quite literally crawling through underground mud trenches while being sprayed with, yes, more mud. Again, being short people, my friend and I had no problem. Actually, I probably could have almost stood up in parts of the "trench".
If you've read this far, remember how we reached a nice creek to clean up in right after landing in a mud pile on Deadman's Drop? Well, this entire course was planned out remarkably well, because it seemed like after every seriously muddy obstacle, it was followed by water. Trenches deposited us right at the banks of a lake, where my friend and I gratefully cleaned ourselves off, especially our faces.
At this point, the course took as back towards the start line, as we could hear the music and drunk people. But not before taking us through a few more obstacles. Next was another unlisted obstacle which involved climbing over a mud mound. Or so it seemed. Because after we got to the top, we found the mud actually dropped into a very deep pool of liquid mud. It was slimy, warm, and viscous. Now, I'm not that prissy, but I kept thinking about all the substances that I couldn't see completely enveloping me, and I was thoroughly disgusted in that pool, so I tried to get out ASAP. We couldn't climb up the other side though, because it was so slippery, so we took a sideways route out, which still involved a butt boost from random strangers.
We were covered from head to toe in mud at this point, but this time, we did not have a lake or a creek, or even a water station to rinse off. Instead, we had another obstacle: Warrior Peak. We had to climb up a giant 12ft tall ramp, with ropes and rungs for support. Now, keep in mind we were covered in wet mud from just a few minutes ago, and because we were doing a later wave, the structure itself was caked in mud. So while we both tried it, it turned into a ridiculous struggle of climbing one step, and sliding all the way down again. So we gave up and moved on.
And to my great relief, there was a water station on the trail! I was so grateful for this course setup, because at this point, I was desperate for water. I didn't actually drink any of it, but I spent a great deal of time cleaning out my mouth and nose. I like to breathe.
There was a nice run through some open fields, and then we reached the Warrior Roast. The flames weren't that high, and there was only one line of kindling, but there is just something about fire that is terrifying. My friend, who never ran before this race, said she had never run so fast, just to make sure she could clear the flames.
Right next door was the behemoth of obstacles: Goliath. There were three parts to this - 1. cargo net climb, 2. balance beam, 3. slide back down. Remember how I had to coax my friend over the tall obstacles before? Well, for some reason, I had all the confidence sucked out of my body. Tables turned and my friend was talking me through this time. I was shaking climbing up the cargo net, but it got even worse when we got to the balance beam. While my friend is not a runner, she is a dancer, so that was no problem for her. I, however, am considerably more uncoordinated and clumsy. So I grabbed on to the support ropes for dear life, and slowly walked across. My friend kept yelling encouragements at me from the other side, which were extraordinarily helpful when I got sprayed with water and couldn't see. I mean, I guess there was only one way to go, but I was so scared in the moment, who knows what I would have done? But finally, we reached the giant water slide, which deposited into a pool of only slightly muddy water. Friend and I decided to go down together, on adjacent slides of course. We held our noses, closed our mouths, and down we went!
The water was a lot deeper than I had anticipated. And I am not a strong swimmer at all. So when my friend started calling my name, I started to wonder if I was drowning. But I made it back to solid ground having only inhaled a little bit of water. My friend hugged me, really tight this time. I think she was grateful I hadn't died, cause I guess I looked like I was going to in the water.
It was almost over! We just had one more obstacle: Mud Mounds, which was exactly was it sounds like - pools and mounds of mud. This subsequently led to the most amusing moment of the day. The end of the obstacle was climbing up, then sliding down a short mud hill. I went first, and everything went as expected until I tried to stand up. I slipped and landed flat on my back. It was a glorious, Donkey-Kong-banana-peel kind of fall.
My friend was still on top of the hill and had just found her parents in the crowd when I fell. So when I turned around, I caught a glimpse of her mid-wave, mid-laugh. It turns out that falling on your head in mud gives you these awesome cakey highlights too, so she could have been thrilled by my new hairdo.
My friend was more graceful with her descent, and we ran across the finish line together. We were Warriors!
Throughout the race, I was strangely apathetic. There's not a lot of camaraderie among the contenders, nor is there a lot of crowd support, not even at the finish line, so I never felt the rush you get for a great social environment. It seemed most of the energy came from the drunken spectators than race itself. This feeling of apathy stayed with me for a few days afterward, but after seeing the pictures, I suddenly felt a sense of accomplishment. My friend she felt it too. Delayed gratification?
I was disappointed by the atmosphere (lack of support between competitors, unfriendly for spectators, too much beer and drunkenness), but I did appreciate how well organized the race was, especially the way the course was planned. I don't know if I'll do this race again, but if I do, it will definitely be with my friend. If there's one way to strengthen a friendship, this is it.
Our legs (and my hands) were covered in mud from the landing, so we were quite pleased when our subsequent run through the woods took us right through a creek. We tried to rinse off in the water, which was nice for about .5 seconds. Cause after the creek, we had to run through some serious mud. And by serious, I mean soft, trampled mud about a foot thick. At some points, it threatened to suck my shoe right off my foot, and at others, it had me sliding like a figure skater on ice (my 4yr old shoes had literally no treads left). My friend had to grab my arm to keep me relatively vertical.
Next was an unlisted obstacle in a grassy clearing (no more sliding in mud!). It was a lot like Iron Crossing, but horizontal, so we had to crawl across a rope net suspended about 4ft off the ground. This was my least favorite obstacle because 1. The supervising volunteer was asleep, 2. I suddenly developed this irrational fear of having my leg fall through the net, losing circulation, and getting said leg amputated, and 3. A group of huge men decided I was going too slow and literally climbed over me. I'm glad to say, though, that with a little encouragement from my friend, I inched across without losing a limb or getting trampled.
After another short run through the woods, we reached Trenches, which was quite literally crawling through underground mud trenches while being sprayed with, yes, more mud. Again, being short people, my friend and I had no problem. Actually, I probably could have almost stood up in parts of the "trench".
If you've read this far, remember how we reached a nice creek to clean up in right after landing in a mud pile on Deadman's Drop? Well, this entire course was planned out remarkably well, because it seemed like after every seriously muddy obstacle, it was followed by water. Trenches deposited us right at the banks of a lake, where my friend and I gratefully cleaned ourselves off, especially our faces.
At this point, the course took as back towards the start line, as we could hear the music and drunk people. But not before taking us through a few more obstacles. Next was another unlisted obstacle which involved climbing over a mud mound. Or so it seemed. Because after we got to the top, we found the mud actually dropped into a very deep pool of liquid mud. It was slimy, warm, and viscous. Now, I'm not that prissy, but I kept thinking about all the substances that I couldn't see completely enveloping me, and I was thoroughly disgusted in that pool, so I tried to get out ASAP. We couldn't climb up the other side though, because it was so slippery, so we took a sideways route out, which still involved a butt boost from random strangers.
We were covered from head to toe in mud at this point, but this time, we did not have a lake or a creek, or even a water station to rinse off. Instead, we had another obstacle: Warrior Peak. We had to climb up a giant 12ft tall ramp, with ropes and rungs for support. Now, keep in mind we were covered in wet mud from just a few minutes ago, and because we were doing a later wave, the structure itself was caked in mud. So while we both tried it, it turned into a ridiculous struggle of climbing one step, and sliding all the way down again. So we gave up and moved on.
And to my great relief, there was a water station on the trail! I was so grateful for this course setup, because at this point, I was desperate for water. I didn't actually drink any of it, but I spent a great deal of time cleaning out my mouth and nose. I like to breathe.
There was a nice run through some open fields, and then we reached the Warrior Roast. The flames weren't that high, and there was only one line of kindling, but there is just something about fire that is terrifying. My friend, who never ran before this race, said she had never run so fast, just to make sure she could clear the flames.
Right next door was the behemoth of obstacles: Goliath. There were three parts to this - 1. cargo net climb, 2. balance beam, 3. slide back down. Remember how I had to coax my friend over the tall obstacles before? Well, for some reason, I had all the confidence sucked out of my body. Tables turned and my friend was talking me through this time. I was shaking climbing up the cargo net, but it got even worse when we got to the balance beam. While my friend is not a runner, she is a dancer, so that was no problem for her. I, however, am considerably more uncoordinated and clumsy. So I grabbed on to the support ropes for dear life, and slowly walked across. My friend kept yelling encouragements at me from the other side, which were extraordinarily helpful when I got sprayed with water and couldn't see. I mean, I guess there was only one way to go, but I was so scared in the moment, who knows what I would have done? But finally, we reached the giant water slide, which deposited into a pool of only slightly muddy water. Friend and I decided to go down together, on adjacent slides of course. We held our noses, closed our mouths, and down we went!
 |
| Courtesy of Gameface. That's one heck of a "gameface" |
The water was a lot deeper than I had anticipated. And I am not a strong swimmer at all. So when my friend started calling my name, I started to wonder if I was drowning. But I made it back to solid ground having only inhaled a little bit of water. My friend hugged me, really tight this time. I think she was grateful I hadn't died, cause I guess I looked like I was going to in the water.
It was almost over! We just had one more obstacle: Mud Mounds, which was exactly was it sounds like - pools and mounds of mud. This subsequently led to the most amusing moment of the day. The end of the obstacle was climbing up, then sliding down a short mud hill. I went first, and everything went as expected until I tried to stand up. I slipped and landed flat on my back. It was a glorious, Donkey-Kong-banana-peel kind of fall.
 |
| Gotta get up! |
My friend was still on top of the hill and had just found her parents in the crowd when I fell. So when I turned around, I caught a glimpse of her mid-wave, mid-laugh. It turns out that falling on your head in mud gives you these awesome cakey highlights too, so she could have been thrilled by my new hairdo.
My friend was more graceful with her descent, and we ran across the finish line together. We were Warriors!
Throughout the race, I was strangely apathetic. There's not a lot of camaraderie among the contenders, nor is there a lot of crowd support, not even at the finish line, so I never felt the rush you get for a great social environment. It seemed most of the energy came from the drunken spectators than race itself. This feeling of apathy stayed with me for a few days afterward, but after seeing the pictures, I suddenly felt a sense of accomplishment. My friend she felt it too. Delayed gratification?
I was disappointed by the atmosphere (lack of support between competitors, unfriendly for spectators, too much beer and drunkenness), but I did appreciate how well organized the race was, especially the way the course was planned. I don't know if I'll do this race again, but if I do, it will definitely be with my friend. If there's one way to strengthen a friendship, this is it.
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