Training Fatigue

I never thought I'd say these words, but right now, I am in the thicket of marathon training.  26.2 miles.  Something I thought I would never do.  Something most people in my life told me I was not capable of.

Guess what?  Marathon training has been going well.  It's weird to think that I used to train for 13.1 miles, because now that seems like a reasonable training run.  The dreaded 20 milers are being completed, and the pain lessens with every run.  I log weekly mileages of 35-40 miles, and as time consuming as training has been, I think I've been pretty successful at integrating it into my schedule.

But with my marathon less than a month away, I am really looking forward to taper.  My muscles don't seem to be recovering between runs anymore; instead of getting stronger, I feel weaker every time I lace up my shoes.  My legs feel like wet noodles all the time.  I've been cutting some runs short because I have become genuinely afraid that I won't be able to make it home.

Exhaustion has permeated my every day life too.  I struggle with taking the stairs at work because I am so weak.  I have accidentally fallen asleep at a grotesquely early hour every night these past weeks, yet still slept through my alarm in the morning.  And I've completely lost my appetite.  A lot of foods make me nauseous, and those that don't still sound repulsive.

My classmates have remarked that the food issue, and not the running issue, might be the primary cause of my extreme fatigue.  We spend a lot of time together, and they have remarked that I don't seem to eat a lot, especially for how much I have been exercising.

It actually makes a lot of sense.  I've been eating (I think) the same amount as before, but running twice as much.  In reality, I've probably been eating less because my appetite has been so suppressed. I've started making a conscious effort to eat a little bit all the time, and seeing if that will help me salvage my training.

Going for a Sub-26: Madison Aruna 5k Recap

Location: Madison, WI

Date/Time: Saturday, October 1, 2016; 8:30 am

Size: 156

Weather: high 40s, slightly windy, cloudy

Course: Road race with rolling hills throughout

Charity: Aruna Project

Time: 24:45

Rank: Overall: 28/156; Age Group (F20-29): 4/23, 5th female

Madison is pretty :)

Taking a Break during Marathon Training

Training for the Madison Marathon is in full gear, and I've been more strict about my workout schedule than ever.  20-25 miles a week, with one day of cross training, one day of yoga, and one long run.  Until this week.

I've been going through some massive personal changes - mostly good ones, but they're throwing me for a loop nevertheless.  The idea of sticking to my training schedule completely overwhelmed me, and this week, I really had to evaluate the reasons I run.  Do I run because I want to achieve something, or do I run because it feels good to me?

For me, it is the latter.

And since marathon training right now is causing me stress and anxiety, I am taking a break.  Probably for a week, maybe for two.  I did go for a slow run in the rain yesterday, which matched my Eeyore-mood (I also got my first high-five from a stranger), but I did it because I needed to clear my head, not because I was trying to hit paces or build up fitness.

So here I am, taking a break from marathon training, and I refuse to let myself feel guilty about it.  Life is more important than that.

Rochester Regional Flower City Half Marathon Recap

Location: Rochester, NY

Date/Time: April 24, 2016

Size: 2112

Weather: Low 40s, cloudy

Course: Road race with rolling hills throughout, larger hills from miles 8-10

Time: 1:58:48

Rank: Overall: 785/2112; Age Group (20-24F): 45/146

Yoga is magical

Summer has been great.  I'm sleeping twice as much, have made some awesome meals, and my hair is no longer graying prematurely.  I've been upping my mileage since I have way more time now, but with increased miles, comes more injury.

My IT band was bothering me yesterday.  This really freaked me out because I've never had pain there before and I didn't know how to deal with it.  After forgetting my  shoes and my sports bra, I ended up missing that window of time after work when it's just cool enough to run, but still light enough that cars could see me on the side of the road.  Whoops.  Accidental rest day happened.

I noticed that my leg was still bothering me even as I was lounging around and it became clear that this IT band was not going to get better on its own.  So I found a yoga tutorial for runners on YouTube, put on some meditative music, and got to work.

I was so stiff.  I could hardly bend over, much less touch my toes.  It was like several hundred miles, pressure at school, stress from work, and grad school applications had all been building up inside me all year and turned me into a petrified statue of tension.  But by the end of that 20 minutes, not only was the IT band pain gone, I was so refreshed, mentally, emotionally and physically.  I felt like I had just had a cathartic talk with a friend, gotten a massage, and woke up after a 4 hour nap, all at the same time.

Yoga, man.  It's magic.

Sick, Freezing, and...Fast?: Friday Knight 5k Recap

Location: Geneseo, NY

Date/Time: October 16, 2015

Size: 51

Weather: High 30s, windy, freezing rain

Course: Steep hills

Time: 26:06 (short course?)

Rank: Overall: 32/51

Ramon Rocha 5k Recap

Location: Geneseo, NY

Date/Time: September 12, 2015

Size: 151

Weather: 40s, rainy

Course: Road race with a slight hill at the start, and steep hill at mile 2

Charity: ARC of Livingston County

Time: 26:26

Rank: Overall: 25/151; Age Group: 2/20

Long Time No Talk: Big Life Updates

I've let this blog rot for a little while.  Yeah, I've been a little lazy, but I've also been really preoccupied with some big happenings in my life.  Here are the really major things that have happened to me since Wineglass:

• I went to Nicaragua for a service learning trip (you can read about that in great detail here)
• I ran another half marathon 
• I graduated with my second bachelor's degree
• I was accepted to graduate school!!!

Grad school means I will be moving across the country yet again in a few months, but for now, I am enjoying a much needed summer break.  I hope to be getting some long overdue posts up soon.

I am a Half-Marathoner! - Wineglass Half Marathon Recap

Location: Corning, NY

Date/Time: October 4, 2015

Size: ~2500

Weather: high 40s - mid 50s, sunny, slightly windy

Course: Flat road race with overall net decline

Time: 2:01:33 (gun time), 1:59:57 (chip time)

Rank: Overall: 578/2391; Age Group: 20/83

Night Before the Race

Tomorrow is the big day.  Tomorrow, I'm running my first half marathon - the Wineglass Half Marathon.

I can hardly believe I signed up nearly a year ago, and I've finally made it here.

I wish I could say I feel ready, and that I'm ready to take it on.  I would have said that a week ago.  I had just done many long runs.  I was feeling confident, excited, and strong.

Things change fast, though.  I had a lot of exams at school and it has been a very, very tough week.  I thought the timing was fine at first - I knew I wouldn't have time to run, but I needed to rest before the race anyway.  But, I didn't have time to eat properly, or sleep either.  I abused my body this last week, and now I'm paying the consequences.  I'm having headaches, I'm having stomach troubles, and emotionally, I'm not where I should be.  Right now, my main focus is trying to rest and getting enough (bland) calories.  I know I will get better, and I really hope that will be in time for the half marathon.

But if not, I'll still be thrilled to walk Wineglass.  There are always more races.

Pre-race Ginger beer to soothe the stomach.

I have a 5k I still need to recap, and then hopefully, I can report back on Wineglass soon!

Oak Tree 5k Race Recap

Location: Geneseo, NY

Date/Time: September 6, 2015

Size: 333

Weather: 70s, sunny, slight wind (perfect weather!)

Course: Road race with a slight hill at the start, and steep hill at mile 2

Charity: Geneseo Valley Conservancy

Time: 26:05

Rank: Overall: 96/333; Age Group: 5/12

Effort

I'm sitting up in bed right now with a pillow against my back.  I would put a heating pad on it, but I'm already sweating just lounging around in my home, and I don't have air conditioning.  I think I strained something right in the curve of my spine - nothing too serious, I'm sure, but it's making me think nonetheless.

This is probably the first time I have ever had a backache, and I think it's correlated to my run this afternoon.  It was hot, but the humidity was the real killer today.  I didn't take this into account, or rather, I chose not to take it into account.  So I would have to put int a little more effort to keep a pace I liked - working a little harder won't kill me.

After the first mile, I realized my pace was almost a full minute slower than what I wanted to maintain.  I was already really uncomfortable at this point.  My stomach was queasy, and my quads were unusually tight.  But my lungs were still feeling good, so I did the rest of my run at a much faster pace, trying to make up for lost time.

As soon as I got into my car, my back spasmed.  I was still able enough to run the rest of my errands for the day, but I definitely had a hunchback doing them.

I think I overdid it.  I think I am overdoing it.

Training for a half and summer goals

Summers are gorgeous in this area, and it seems like everyone has come out of hibernation and laced up their shoes.  Running culture is pretty prominent here, and I am constantly hearing my coworkers talk about their race schedules and how they are training for their next event.  They are using apps, books, online coaches, etc.  My company blog has even started a "Get Fit Series".

And everyone once in a while, someone will stop by my cubicle and say, "I heard you're running Wineglass!  How is training going?"

Cue the crickets.

The truth is that I'm not really training.  I'm not following any plan.  I just run when I can, and I trust that by the time Wineglass rolls around, I'll be fit enough to finish.

Body running amok

I've always prided myself on having a very strong immune system.  During college, I got sick once, maybe twice.  And if I did get sick, I just denied, denied, denied until it went away so I couldn't remember if I was ever sick in the first place.

This has not been the case this week.

One of my favorite sitcoms to air was Dharma and Greg and this episode describes my situation to a T.

Ok, so I don't have gout.  But in the last week, I've had 5 migraines, 2 sore throats, a cough, a runny nose, a 24-hour fever, 2 cases of pinkeye, 1 puffy foot tendon, a persistent case of the hiccups, some mystery face bruises, and approximately -100,000 hairs on my head.  Not to mention I was just sick little over a month ago.  All minor things, but this is coming from someone who worked in an ER in the midst of flu season without even catching a sniffle.

I'm getting worried, not because being sick is so terrible, but because I think that I brought this illness onto myself.

Being proud

I am done with the semester!  I can't even express how relieved I am, because it has been a very hard semester.  I was a straight-A student right up until I graduated high school, and even though I got a "B" here and there in college I finished my first (very tough) degree with honors.  One would expect college 2.0 would be pretty effortless for me.

Not the case.  Last week, I went into one of finals feeling adequately prepared.  When I looked at the test, it was like it was in a foreign language.  I don't know what was going on with my brain (anxiety attack, maybe?), but I couldn't understand a thing.  I turned in the final three hours later and begged my professor not to fail me.*

Yeah, I'm one of those students who always leaves a test thinking that "I failed" when I probably got B.  Only this time, I was pretty sure I actually failed, as in F.

And yet, I can't regret what I did this semester.  I put in 100%, and while it's frustrating to get such mediocre results, I know I could not have possibly put more effort than I did.  Maybe I took on too much.  Maybe I'm getting too old to compete with the youngsters (I'm only 22, but if you're 18, enjoy it while you can cause it all goes downhill from there).  In any case, I'm proud of everything I did, even if I don't have anything to show for it.

Another thing I'm proud of?  My run last night.

6.1 miles.  8:54 min/mile.

It was long.  It was fast.  And I didn't feel like I was going to die afterwards.  I probably could have gone a couple extra miles, but it was already 7:00 pm  and I was hungry.

Honestly, I don't always love running, but I love seeing these achievements.  Not everyone can run 6 miles, especially the girl who couldn't run the mile in gym class.  Now if only that could get me into graduate school...

*I didn't fail!  Now, wish me luck in organic chemistry...

"You look like a bagel."

That's what my mom said to me today.

I was trying on some dresses from her closet, and she made a comment about how she didn't understand why I still had some belly fat even though I'd been running more.  I mentioned that I thought it was because I had eaten a bagel earlier in the day, and that I was bloated (I think I have issues with gluten).  She laughed, saying, "You look like a bagel."

And people wonder why I moved out of her house...

Even though I told her multiple times, my mom doesn't understand that she hurts people with the things that she says.  Whenever I tell her I was hurt by something she said, she refuses to listen, and somehow ends up blaming me for being too sensitive and restricting her freedom of speech.  But, if I could talk to her, these are the things that I wish I could say:

Just keep running...

As if you haven't heard me complain enough...this has been a very tough winter.  And just when everyone thought it was over, it snowed earlier this week, at the end of April.  My new policy is if there is no snow on the ground, I must make every effort to get out and run, because who knows when the next time will be?

Luckily, today was a lovely day.  High 40s, a little windy, but very bright.  I put on my technical jacket and running tights and went to the canal.

7:53 and 70 degrees

Do you see that 2 mile split?  7:53.  What?!  I did that?  Excuse me while I take a moment...

No more races?

I'm getting to a point where I love running.  I love having that time to myself to forget about the million things I worry about at any given time, to be able to zone out, learn something new on my favorite podcast, and see what my body can do.  That being said, I don't think I love racing.  Granted, I've only run three.  But, while I feel like a lot of people run to race, I just run to run.  For now, I think I might hold off on the races, and these are some reasons why:

The Runner's Body

I found this YouTube series called "The Runner's Body" and I was very inspired.  I watched every single video.  I love that the interviews covered runners of all types of body types and backgrounds.  Here's just one example: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-RtKmzJv0E

And just for funsies, I decided to answer the questions too!